Today after arriving at class and after greetings, teacher looked at me and said:
You look broken!
Yes! Actually, I'm broken. I thought studying can be easier than being a soldier but it's NOT! Being a soldier is about loneliness and having hard physical conditions. But studying? I think my brain can't handle it! After four years of being far from studying, it's really hard to start again. My face is awful, just like a lonely addicted guy. I can't go ahead with my progress! I can't get up early in the morning! Because I got tired so bad. Tired of everything! Not just studying! Everything seems meaningless. Even writing this text in English! Even learning English! And! First of all, by far the best problem that I have, is nothing but goddam overthinking! I think I'm in the fight club! I really need some guys to punch my face to wake me up! and make me feel better...
That's why I'm broken! And today was the last session with the best teacher that I've ever had! I couldn't get the best score in class, cause he was a little bit strict, but it's ok! being among people who are better than you, is better than being among people who aren't. So, I never forget him.
A Broken Boy
Let's listen:
Jeremy Soule - Harvest Dawn
